To Boldly Recap Star Trek TNG: 1×01 “Encounter at Farpoint”

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Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Unicorner. Her continuing mission to recap every episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. To seek out new lulz and new fun times. To boldly go where many have recapped before but nobody as cool as she.

For a while, I’d been wanting to recap a classic show from my childhood. It’s fun seeing how well (or not well) the show holds up over the years and the different impressions watching as an adult. Jenny Trout’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer recaps largely inspired these, so credit where it’s due.

If you are familiar with my K-pop recaps over on my K-pop blog, Ahjummas Anonymous, then you already know what my recapping style is like. For those new to the party, I cuss a lot and have difficulty taking shit seriously, so if any of those things bother you, you might want to peace out right now. I write the way that comes naturally to me, not because I’m trying too hard to be ~edgy or whatever, so I have no intentions of changing my writing style. So strap the fuck in and get comfortable, because shit’s about to go off.

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TV Recap: Shadowhunters S01E12 “Malec” or “One Wedding and a Funeral… For My Attention Span”

We’re coming down the final stretch, guys. One more episode and season one is over. I shall soon taste freedom.

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TV Recap: Shadowhunters S01E11 “Blood Calls to Blood” or “How to Get Away With Trying to Murder a Seelie”

Excuse this recap for being a bit late, I was busy watching youtube videos of guinea pigs leaping in slow motion.

In other fantastic news, Stitchers a.k.a.the superior Freeform crappy show, is back! And it’s on Tuesday night, meaning my bad acting and worse accents quota is now complete.

This Shadowhunters episode contains many of the same beloved Shadowhunters-isms we’ve seen numerous times in the past, so I’ve decided it’s time for a drinking game. If you’d like to play along, I highly recommend a nonalcoholic beverage unless you’ve got a hollow leg, as the Unicorner does not wish to be responsible for any alcohol poisoning.

Tonight’s episode hinges around a bit of a mystery, meaning you’d have to be completely brain dead not to see the twist coming from 39.5 miles away, which means you’re probably as stupid as the writers think you are, and definitely as stupid as Jace.

But I get ahead of myself. Let’s start at the beginning.

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TV Recap: Shadowhunters s01e06: “Of Men and Angels” or “Magnus Explains It All”

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So this week, Shadowhunters takes a big dump all over us—an info dump, that is. Magnus and Luke answer all our burning questions, but sadly still don’t tell me when this show is going to get cancelled already.

Wait, who am I kidding? You know my ass is gonna end up recapping this shit until 2050.

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TV Recap: Shadowhunters s01e05: “Moo Shu to Go” or “Who’s in Charge of This Shitshow, Anyway?”

Greetings, fellow masochists, for it’s time to gather ‘round for another Shadowhunters recap!

A new gif to shake things up a little!

A new gif to shake things up a little!

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Shadowhunters S01E03 “Dead Man’s Party” or “This Show Gets Homoerotic as Fuck”

It’s that time again! Time for another Shadowhunters recap!

No, I will never tire of this gif.

No, I will never tire of this gif.

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Shadowhunters S01E02 “The Descent Into Hell Is Easy” or “All You Have To Do is Watch This Show”

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Aaaaaaand I’m back with another Shadowhunters recap. Let us rejoice and be glad!

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